A Letter to Aidan

Dear Aidan,

I love you, bud. I’m pretty sure you know that. No, I’m not Mom, but I’m a pretty good guy. We’ve had some great Dad/Aidan times — and I know there will be more.

I know you’re tired and still getting over being sick — again. And, I know the albuterol is probably playing a little part in this, but my biggest frustration as a parent is a morning like today. A morning when I needed more patience than ever to just have a normal conversation with you.

I know you like to run, but when it aggravates the bronchitis, you really can’t. I know you love to jump all around, but when it means torpedoeing into the furniture, you really can’t. I know you love your sister. I see all the sweet things you do, but that doesn’t mean you can push her down with both hands when she wants to play blocks, too.

And, Aidan, I know how smart you are. So I know you understand when I tell you things. Yet, you don’t do them — particularly this morning. I understand that you’re four. I totally get that.

I also understand that patience is not one of my strong points. Please know I’m working on that. Please know that any frustration I show is just that. I can’t love you any more than I do, A. But, I need to work on staying within myself, so to speak, when something like the following happens:

Aidan, in the chair, please for timeout.

No, daddy.

Aidan, when you (insert latest tantrum here), then you need to spend a minute in timeout.

No, daddy.

(Ire growing)

Aidan, in the chair or I will take you upstairs to your room.

No, daddy.

— That may not seem frustrating or patience trying to you, Aidan, but it really is to me. I know you understand. I know you comprehend.

And, I also know you’re testing me. Just as you test Mom in the afternoon. I’m working hard, Aidan, to pass all these tests. And, lately it seems like there are quite a few.

When I don’t talk for a minute or walk out of the room, it’s nothing that you did — it’s more for me. To collect my thoughts to avoid from getting beyond frustrated with you.

I know you’re tired. I know you’re sick. And I want you to know that like the book says, I love you all the time. And I’m trying as hard as I can to be the best Dad ever. For you (and E).

So, Aidan, while I’m working on being patient with you, it probably wouldn’t be a bad thing for you to be patient with me, too.

Love you, bud.


8 Comments on “A Letter to Aidan”

  1. Stormy says:

    Hang in there man. You’re a fantastic Dad & he may not show it all the time, but he knows it & will always know it.

  2. Pessimistic Redhead says:

    You should save this and give it to him when he has kids.

    You sound like a really great dad. And I would know–I have a great dad so I know what they’re like.

    Have a good weekend.

  3. JenBun says:

    I agree that you should definitely save this and show it to him later!

    You are absolutely handling yourself well– it sounds SO frustrating!

    Here’s hoping he feels better– and gets back to his usual sweet self– soon! 🙂

  4. WOW you are a GREAT DAD!! It shows! I love the letter, I know how frustrating it can be, sounds like you are doing great!! I hope he is feeling better

  5. Sara says:

    You are doing an amazing job, and in your heart you know it. Your kids are lucky to have such an amazing father and in their hearts, they know it too.

  6. Stephanie says:

    I remember many “trying” days like those…I remember locking myself in my room so I could take a “time out” so I wouldn’t yell at or even worse hit my boys. Those days also make you understand a little easier how child abuse happens…especially when you are talking about parents who are not as intelligent or compassionate as you are. As my mom said to me on a weekly basis…”this too shall pass.” Hey just wait til the middle school years. My favorite saying was, “teenagers are the reason some animals eat their young.”

  7. Melissa says:

    Congrats to you for handling yourself so well!

    Lack of patience and control is a good reason why some people just shouldn’t have kids.

  8. Janette says:

    Thanks for sharing this. The terrible 2’s are starting early and I have a lot to learn from the experienced pros. Good to know that frustration can happen to even the best of them. Hang in there.

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